June 20, 2024


Built General Tough


The Sunday driver: Goodbye my Bell

The German Defense Minister Annegret Kramp-Karrenbauer also says something right: “This is a legend that we are saying goodbye today”. The legend, however, was not about a deserving general or politician, something like that is even rarer today than a mask shop without a smell. And if there should still be legends in the workforce of the ministries, they will not be passed with a big tattoo, but rather discreetly disposed of in temporary retirement. In Germany you don’t want to be reminded of quality.

Good old Bell was really lucky and Mrs. Karrenbauer had a bright moment. The beauty is the American helicopter Bell UH-1Dwho served in the Bundeswehr and the Federal Border Police for 50 years. The naming is an early case of gender justice then the Helicopter was called the Bell. The nickname is also “Huey” phonetic in American for “UH”, which also helps the neuter to its right. On the other hand, the middle name is not at all woke: Iroquois (Iroquois). Incidentally, American troops were stationed near my home in the Eifel. That was for them Bell something like a taxi that can fly. In contrast to today’s so-called air taxis, which also make a lot of noise, but can’t fly.

Now and then the Americans apparently went on a bowling trip to the Ramstein Airbase in the Palatinate. Our house on the slope seems to have been an Iroquois waypoint, they used the air space above our roof almost according to schedule, and I was always afraid that they would touch the lightning rod. Or maybe they just wanted to wake up the American Air Force officer who lived on the first floor. His presence was easy on the red one Ford Falcon Cabriolet to be seen in front of the garage. They were called Bell also “Carpet beater”. First the rotor knocked softly in the distance, then the rhythmic beating grew louder and louder until the beams of our roof bent underneath. Then the thing rushed away like an Icelandic waterfall, flying low. My fascination for helicopters stems from this time, which has apparently crept into the result, because our son’s first spoken word was: “Hubasabber”.

“Because otherwise they’ll shoot our eggs away”

The popping-flopping sound of the rotor blades even became a musical legend. Especially as the theme song from the film Apocalypse Now by Francis Ford Coppola. In the “Ride of the valkyries“Wagner, the helicopter and the Vietnam War form a completely insane symphony of violence.

What one the Bell, the US Army’s first turbine-powered helicopter, actually does an injustice: It was originally developed to rescue and evacuate wounded soldiers in enemy territory, and its knock in the sky signaled countless desperate GIs: Help is on the way. Unfortunately, he also revealed it to the enemy. The film dialogue with a newcomer on board was very successful: “Why are you all sitting on your helmets?” Answer: “Because otherwise they’ll shoot our eggs away”. The iconographic photo of the last flight that left the lost Saigon also shows one Bell Huey, the American evacuated from the roof of a CIA building.

In Germany, it also enjoyed a good reputation as a rescue helicopter, but it achieved notoriety at the Olympic massacre in Munich: During an amateurish attempt at liberation, the two Bells were riddled with bullets with the hostages, A hand grenade exploded in one of the two. 17 people died.

Not a new tablecloth since Queen Victoria

The helicopter was a definite bestseller. A total of 16,000 Bell HU1 launched. Ukraine currently wants the Even relaunch air oldtimers. Alternatively, I could use a used one Bell HU1 for $ 99,000, so recommend a mere 80,000 euros, location Belgium. Something like that makes a much slimmer foot than a Porsche 911, in my opinion, the consumption of around 160 liters per 100 kilometers is put into perspective because you save on police officers, speed traps and other highwaymen and can park on any flat roof.

My personal ascension with the beautiful woman came to me in 1980 in India Chandigarh granted. At that time I trained in the editorial office of star (Konrad Kujau had not yet delivered the Hitler diaries to my regret) and was used to report on the Himalayan rally ordered to distant India. The Indian photographer had an obscure one for aerial photography Bell together with the opaque pilot found in Chandigarh, who flew us into Kashmir.

The area was as beautiful as the Black Forest and about as safe as Kabul. Nevertheless, I was very happy to have solid ground under my feet again. The valleys at the foot of the Himalayas are deep and are crossed by almost invisible power lines, which has been the undoing of many carpet knockers. In addition, there are unpredictable fall winds. It feels like an elevator in the Empire State Building that suddenly drops 30 floors. And no sooner has he caught himself than he sags through 20 floors again. Fortunately it braked Bell time and again, and we ended up on the meadow in front of a British colonial mansion.

And that brings us to the helicopter money

The waiters, with their white gloves, appeared to have been from the previous century – and the tablecloth didn’t seem to have been set again since Queen Victoria. I would have liked to have stayed there, but the local population had, by throwing stones, made the rally convoy in a friendly but definitely not welcome. A tip that should be taken seriously in this region. So we climbed ours Bell and made our way out of the dust, tapping the carpet. There are situations in life where a helicopter is really useful. I would also find a Bell very appropriate for my last trip, or alternatively I would ask for Prince Philip’s Land Rover. Incidentally, today all three parties to the Kashmir conflict (India, China, Pakistan) have nuclear weapons.

And that brings us to the helicopter money. Helicopter money is the only atomic bomb that can be delivered by helicopter. This is understood to mean the expansion of the money supply through money creation, in which the newly created central bank money is paid out directly to the state or citizens. And so long until the monetary value is pulverized like the cathedral of Hiroshima. In principle, helicopter money is exactly what is raining down from the sky as corona aid at the moment. Dear Federal Government, how about a little more style? Get the stuff out of one Bell HU1 raining down. At least that would be a show. The payload of the Bell is 1,760 kilos, that’s how much 100-euro bills weigh around 176 million euros. I ask you to use my house as a waypoint and to deliver the cash through the skylight.

Dirk Maxeiner has published the Achgut edition: “Help, my dog ​​is overtaking me on the right. Confessions of a Sunday driver. “ Ideal for black, white, red, green, yellow, blue, all gender identities as well as dog owners and cat lovers, as a spark plug for every occasion (s). Available postage free here.